Monday, November 12, 2007

Not going home

So I don't know if I've mentioned this on here before, but I'm not coming home for Christmas. One of the reasons is that its amazingly expensive, but the other, more important reason, is that there are literally a hand full of people who I want to see in Portland. In no particular order those people are: Drew, Shannon, Emily, Barb, and Gail (aka Neuroknitter). I of course also wouldn't mind seeing my mom but I don't feel a pressing need to. I'm not very close with her (and am content with that) and talk to her at least once a week on the phone. I guess what it comes down to is that I really don't want to deal with Christmas with the extended family - they very well may just be why I'm not a big fan of Christmas and Thanksgiving (though I'm slowly growing to like Thanksgiving - feasting with friends is what makes it good).

I guess I feel like I am, as much as I hate using this term sometimes, the black sheep in the family. The best, to the point, example of why I feel like that would be when I was in the room with someone from my extended family this summer and they forgot what instrument I play...literally forgot. I have been playing the flute for 10 years, half of my life. You don't forget these things. Oh and this wasn't my grandmother who I would forgive of such things (though would still be a little unhappy - at least she remembers my birthday). At the same time these people go to the basketball games of my second cousins.

So I guess me not going home feels a bit liberating. Its like I'm breaking free of the chains. I'm used to not going home for Thanksgiving, but this'll be the first time for Christmas. Maybe what I'm really worried about is being alone for Christmas. I mean I'm not really at all religious, and I don't even like exchanging gifts very much. I think its the fact that there will be thousands of people all around the city who will be with their families and/or loved ones during that time and I'm afraid and frankly envious of them that I may not be.

In other happier news. Avast is going well - I've got five inches of the body knit. Pictures will come when it looks a little more exciting that it does now.

4 comments:

annie... said...

Adam!!!
You need to come to Krakow for Christmas!!!!!!!!!!!! Sarah Merch. and I are going to bake cherry and pistachio scones and sing songs. And I can only sing off-key!!
awesome!
I hope to see you then!
love,
annie...

Adam said...

That, would possibly be the best Christmas ever!!!! You'll have to come out to Vienna sometime and visit me - because I miss you :)
love,
adam

annie... said...

Adam, you should really come. Email Sarah to figure out details... I leave the mill on Tuesday, for good, and then I'm traveling about for awhile. I will arrive in Krakow on the 23rd and stay for about a week. I hope you join us!
awesome!
annie...

Hey, Happy Thanksgiving! Last year's Power House celebration was great!

Adam said...

Annie - Sarah and I have been chatting back and forth and it looks like I'll be with you guys for Christmas! So I'm not all quite sure when I'll get to Poland but I know I want to be back in Vienna for New Years so I can watch the New Years concert/ball on TV (its really famous).

Happy thanksgiving to you too, I miss last years thanksgiving but I'm actually at Oxford right now with a bunch of the Sarah Lawrence students who are studying here so its pretty awesome (but nothing will compare to the powerhouse).